The thing about king beds...

I had a girlie sleepover on the eve of my sister’s nuptials. We snapped a photo of the 2 of us all cozied up in their extremely comfortable king bed and sent it mockingly to my poor brother-in-law-to-be, who was exiled to his parents house to sleep on a futon.

I always feel the need to let my affection be shown a little more when I’m in a king with someone. I share the pillow with S&P most of the night. Otherwise, I’m over in no man’s land and could just as well be at my own house. In my queen bed though, I am perfectly happy to just touch my foot to some part of his leg and feel like that is a completely adequate way to say “I’m glad you’re here.”

This night here I found myself sharing the pillow with my sister, as well. I kept my head on half of a large pillow, my back was to her and my feet were well into my brother-in-law’s side of the bed. She didn’t seem to mind me wanting to be close and we both fell asleep pretty quickly.

In the middle of the night, I basically mounted my unsuspecting sibling. I stroked her hair, which is my signature opening in my "wee hours of the morn, I’m so happy to be cuddled up next to you" move. Then I leaned in for a smooch. Thank god she woke up - and quite startled, I might add.

She raised her hand, as if to say “get the fuck away from me, you crazy bitch” and I immediately realized I was trying to give sweet kisses to my sister and not S&P. I apologized profusely, but she had already fallen back to sleep by the time I was half way through explaining what had happened.

I rolled over as far as I could and lay shamefully, waiting for the sun rise.