The freaks come out at night

Sorry I have neglected you people the last couple of days. Clients have been coming out of the wood work for massages and I have been all too happy to take every appointment possible.

This weekend I went to see a musician play at a local bar. The guy's name is The Sauce Boss. He was old as day. That old fucker was all about the ladies though. His opening song was about some chick's claws in his back. His gimmick is making a huge pot of gumbo on stage during his set. He wears a chef’s hat and sells his own line of hot sauce during intermission as well. It was a great show and the people watching was even greater.

There was one couple that completely captivated the entire joint that night. There was a little Korean woman and her man moving around the impromptu dance floor in a way that can hardly be called dancing. If I could only figure out how to post a video to my blog, I would gladly get the group I was with that night to do a demo. She made Elaine from Seinfeld look like someone worthy of performing in the Nutcracker. She kept a very stern face the entire time, even though it was pretty obvious she was having the time of her life. She would raise her arms out to the side kind of like a teenaged kid looking to 'front with some other punk, crossed with a bird ready to take flight. She seriously looked like she was about to cut a bitch and yet doing an aerobics move. Her white-haired lover would then run his fingers through her hair vigorously. It was like they were both on ecstasy, although their age and the given venue made it hard for me to believe that was the case. It was the strangest shit I’ve seen in quite some time.

I turned and opened my mouth to comment to my friends when one of them said exactly what I was thinking. “Can you imagine what they are like in bed? What a freaking train wreck that must be.”

The Sauce Boss called them up on stage and thanked them for their “interpretive dance” and gave her a free bottle of Liquid Summer.

I regret with every fiber of my being not following those crazies home that night and trying to peep in a window. I’m pretty sure they would be excellent material.